EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: Here's the deal. The Profanator and I teamed up on this one. This is our second joint scam and as much as I would love to take credit for this one, he's the evil genius behind this classic. He is Father Will U. Tuchme (red text) and I am Sister Anita Hanchob (blue text). This one has a religious theme to it and if you are Catholic and can't laugh at yourself, skip this one. It's all in good fun.
ORIGINAL EMAIL: From Mrs. Kante to Father Tuchme(5/28)
Mrs. Judith Kante
E-mail: mrs_k@rediffmail.com
Dear Sir,
With due respect and humility,
I write you this letter which I believe you would be of great assistance to me.
I got your contact from the world trade center (W. T.C) here in Bangkok, Thailand. I
am Mrs. Judith Kante the wife of Mr. Randi Kante of blessed memory. My husband
was assassinated by the rebel forces loyal to Major John Paul Koroma. Before
his assassination, he was the director general, National Gold and mining corporation
of Sierra Leon. My husband was one of the main classes of people targeted
by the rebel forces in Sierra Leon. In the course of the revolution in the country,
prominent people were hijacked
from their homes to unknown destination. My husband was hijacked
and was killed by the rebels. Two days before his death he managed to sneak
out a written message informing me of a trunk box which he conceived under the
roof of our house containing valuables and cash sum of ($28.500,000USD) Twenty
eight millions five hundred thousand Dollars. He instructed me and my only son
to move out of Sierra Leon with the money to Bangkok, Thailand immediately before
the powerful Economic Community of West African States (ECOWAS) forces intervened
which eventually resulted to a brutal civil war.
I and my son managed to escape
to Bangkok, Thailand with the trunk box containing the money through the help
of an air craft pilot and we are now temporary residing in Bangkok as asylum
seekers. In order to avoid people raising an eyebrow over the Hugh some of money,
I decided to deposit the trunk box with a security organization for safe keeping
and security purposes. Be informed that the real content of the box was not disclosed
to the security organization and we do not want them to know this under any circumstances
rather we deposited the box as containing family valuables. Please we want
you to come and assist us claim this box from the security organization because
we have no documents to prove ownership
and source of this Hugh sum
of money if we are questioned in the Bank, we therefore need your assistance
by coming here to claim this money on your foreign Bank account. You will
be required to open a non residence Bank Account in any Bank of
your choice here in Bangkok
and get the money deposited in the account, there after you order the Bank manager
to transfer the money to your account overseas.You shall also source for good
investment for us where we can invest the
money wisely. We have it
in mind to establish a rewarding investment and
good relationship with you.
Concerning the money, we
are prepared to give you a reasonable sum of 40% of the total money and 5% would
be mapped out for any expenses incurred in the cause of this transaction, then
55% will be for me and my son.If you are willing to assist us, you can reach
me and my son immediately you receive this letter for more information to enable
us proceed
towards concluding all our
arrangements. No other person knows about this money apart from my son and I.
Please keep it very confidential.
We await your urgent response.
Best regards,
Mrs. Judith Kante.
NB:PLEASE DO RESPOND ON MY
PRIVATE E-MAIL ADDRESS: mrs_k@rediffmail.com
From Father Tuchme to Mrs. Kante (5/28)
My Dearest
Mrs. Kante:
I
am receipt of your e-mail message. I must say I am saddened by the loss of your
husband and the refugee status you and you son have had to adopt in order to
find assylum. I can only thank the lord God himself for seeing you safely out
of Sierra Leone (where I hear cannibalism of pygmies is rife by the rebel forces
-- now that I think about it, is that the Congo?). Was the flight you chartered
ok?
I
must admit, Mrs. Kante, that I am perplexed. Why would the world trade center
in Bangkok list me as a contact? Allow me to explain: My name is Father William
U. Tuchme. I am a Catholic Priest and man of the cloth. I oversee a large Diocese
in New York State. How does this imply I am a businessman? Obviously, being in
the church in the USA is very lucrative, but I do not understand the connection.
Madam,
I feel I must pray in order to have guidance from the lord regarding this. If
I pray hard, and swing my smoke ball around, I am sure he will instruct me to
help.
I
would like to hear back from you with more details of this transaction, at once.
Until then, you may address me as Father or Your Holiness. Once I feel you are
genuine, you may call me by my first name, Will.
I
ask for your respect and cooperation.
Fondest
regards and the will of God to you and your son.
Sincerely,
Father
Will U. Tuchme
From Mrs. Kante to Father Tuchme(5/29)
Dear Father Will U. Tuchme,
I have received your reply
to my mail and I was so happy to learn that you are revrend father. That
alone has given me a great confidence.
Well, since you are a man
of God, I have nothing to fear again, I can impose all my confidence and trust
in you. Please always put my family and me in your prayers. I will
love you to please send me your full name and address as it is going to appear
in the certificate of deposit, so that the finance company can change all the
documentation to your name. As soon as the change is being done, they will
send it to you that will enable you claim this money and make a wire transfer
directly to your own account so that we can be able to suggest the mutual investment
that could be done with your full guidance.
As soon as I hear from you,
we will start the processing immediately. May almighty God continue to
giude and bless you, till we see. Have a wonderful day.
Mrs. Kante Judith.
From Father Tuchme to Mrs. Kante (5/29)
Dear Mrs.
Kunte:
I
am pleased that you are strong of faith. Surely, if we do proceed, the Lord will
bless the modalities of this very transaction. However, In your excitement, you
seem to have forgotten my question regarding how you came to hear of me as a
contact in the world trade center, Bangkok. I cannot, and will not enter into
a partnership (business or otherwise) without knowing about the individuals with
whom I am dealing.
I
would like to know a little more about you. What is your son's name? How old
is he? Where are you from? Is your son single? Do you have any hobbies? What
kind of investment are you referring to? How have you been edjucated?
I
cannot proceed without a little dialogue between us. I will start, and I expect
your honest response:
My
name is Bishop Dr. William U. Tuchme. I am referred to as Bishop Tuchme, Father
Tuchme, and Holiness. When I get to know people they call me Will, or Willy.
I am the Bishop for the Diocese of the Touching Cloth. I have my Masters Degree
in Divinity and My Doctorate in Theology. I am single believing that only God
can fill me with the goodness I need. I run a childrens' program (young boys
only) through my local Diocese. I believe that children are the joy of our Heavenly
Father, therefore I council and assist young boys in the development of their
futures. My quartely camp is named the Follow Through Mission for Boys. The kids
refer to me as Big Willy or The Bishop.
Mrs.
Kante, I travel often to various Dioces around the USA and, being high of stature
in the Catholic church, I regularly attend meetings at the Vatican. Next week,
as it happens, I am attending one such meeting with His Holiness, the Pope, in
the Vatican. I will have my computer so I will be able to e-mail through my trip.
However, this leads me into a new topic: Confidentiality.
I
have recently needed legal council due to quite serious disturbances in the church.
I know you have asked for my silence in regards to this issue, but I will want
to speak to my legal councilor and dear friend, Sister Anita Hanchob. Will this
be a problem? We pray together and are one with the church. Please advise.
That
is a little about me. I am enclosing a picture so that you can put a face to
my words. I would appreciate the same from you including personal information
so I may get to know you. I would also like for you to answer the question of
how the Bangkok world trade center had me as a contact.
In
love, light, faith and spirit of the Father, Son, and the Holy Ghost, I bless
you and your son and remain,
Faithfully
yours,
Father
Will U. Tuchme
From Mrs. Kante to Father Tuchme(5/29)
Attention: Father Will U. Tuchme.
Dear Father Will,
I greet you this day in the
name of Our Lord Jesus, the propitiation of our sins, and also to acknowlegde
the receipt your e-mail to me.
(1)a. My Son's name is Tubnman
Senghor Kante, and he will be 16 years of age in a few weeks from now. He is
single. I am from Sierra Leone. I am educated up to High School Level, and in
addition , I have a teacher's Grade II Certificate, being a trained Teacher.
(b) Of course as you already
know, my name is Mrs Judith Kante, wife of late Mr. Randi Kante, who was the
Director General of National Gold & Mining Corporation of Sierra Leon, who
was assissinated in the infraticidal war in Sierra Leon.
(c) I am referring to investments
like Real Estate, or any other high yeild investment.
(2) As earlier indicated,
I got your contact in a journal I was going throuhg at the World Trade Centre
here in Bangkok, as a clergyman, my intuition told me that you will be in the
best position to assist me and my son in this regard, because I have long held
the fear that I may get into the wrong and unscrupulous hands, who at the successful
conclution of this transaction may decide to cheat me and my son out of the proceeds.
Essentially, what attracted me was that your disposition on profil as a man of
God, you will best suit my purpose in this endeavour.
(3) As to whether or not
you should tell this to your Sister Anita; You know that I have overtime maintained
a high level secrecy over this, in the belief that every best friend/confidant
has another best friend elsewhere. So I do not wish for a situation where this
transaction will be blown ever before we commence. However, should you think
there wont be any problem,then its up to you.
Already, I have sent out
your name:- Bishop Dr.William U.Tuchme to the Security Company, to enable them
effect a change in the Certificate of Deposit to your name, and sent by e-mail
attachment to you, to enable you proceed for the claim. Also attached is my photograph,
in reciprocity to the one you sent me.
Thanks for your co-operation.
Yours faithfully,
Mrs. Judith Kante.
From Sister Hanchob to Mrs. Kante (5/30)
Dear Mrs.
Judith Kante,
Hello,
my name is Sister Anita Hanchob. I too am part of the Diocese of the Touching
Cloth and work directly with Father Will U. Tuchme. I am his personal assistant
and he thought it would be good if I introduced myself to you as apparently,
you will be doing some business together. I handle a lot of his paper work,
financial business, problems and cover-ups. He is a great man and you,
like myself, are lucky to know him. I want you to know that if you need
anything, please feel free to contact me as well as Father
Tuchme. I
have recently added you to my list of people to pray for and I hope we can get
you through your hard times. There is this saying in the Catholic church
that goes "abstinence makes the church grow fondler." I feel
nothing could be more appropriate for your situation and judging from your letter,
you know exactly what I am talking about. If you keep your faith in the
lord and stay on the path, you shall be rewarded.
I
have attached a recent photo of myself. This was taken for the annual church
yearbook. I'm just learning this computer thingy. As you can tell
from my photo, I'm pretty old. I'm not too old to learn though. I
use to think the Internet was Satan's lair but Father Tuchme changed my thinking. He
was always helping these wonderful young boys who he would meet in chat rooms. They
were troubled and he brought stability to their lives. Kind of like what
he wants for you.
Stay
strong sister and pray. Pray like hell.
Sister
Anita Hanchob
From Mrs. Kante to Sister Hanchob (5/30)
Attention: Sister Anita.
Dear Sister,
This is to acknowledge your
e-mail which I received with gratitude. May I thank you in the name of our Lord
Jesus.
I sent an e-mail to Father
Will today alongside my photograph, and I hope that with your inclusion, you
will as a woman, understand the pains and pangs I feel as a result of widowhood,
and consequently assist in expeditious handling of this transaction, to save
me and my son from an inpending financial calamity.
I am hopefully awaiting
Father Will's response, and trusting too that your involvment assures me of my
safety. Therefore, I wish for us to commence immediately the process of actualising
this transaction, such as Father Will furnishing me with the information I seek
as to how he would want his name appear on the Certificate of Deposit. I need
this urgently.
Goodbye and may the peace
of the Lord that passes all understanding be with you.
Thanks for your co-operation.
Yours faithfully,
Mrs Judith Kante.
From Sister Hanchob to Mrs. Kante (5/30)
Dear Mrs.
Kante,
I
just received your email. Father Tuchme has read your email (the one with
the photo) and is planning to respond as soon as possible. He is very busy
today. He had stop by the children’s hospital today to pray for the
young boys who are paralyzed. Father Tuchme feels so bad for them because
they can’t walk, run, or yell for help due to their inability to move. He
meets and prays with them one by one in their room. It’s nice because
he brings God into their lives. I promise you this, he will respond and
we will help you. Hopefully he will write as soon as he gets back from
the hospital. Sometimes he is a little late as he likes to stop by the
pub and get a little liquored up before returning to the church. As good
Catholics, it is our duty to God. Our Lord Jesus would not want it any
other way.
What
religion are you dear? I understand the pains and pangs you are feeling. I
will ask God to help take both of those away. Maybe one day Father Tuchme
and I can sit with you and tell you how the Diocese of the Touching Cloth operates. You
and your son would love our church.
Praying
for you every minute.
Sister
Anita Hanchob
From Mrs. Kante to Sister Hanchob (5/31)
Sister Anita,
Thanks to hear from you again.
I'm very happy to hear that father is praying for disables and God with his infinite
mercy help them survive their situation.
Unfortunately, I am renowned
catholic and with the so help to meet with you and father.
Please have father reply
my mails it is very very urgent because I am receiving from the finance company
the certificate of deposit on Monday and I will be sending it through e-mail
attachment to father. I need to know if the name already given by the father
is correct.
Please have him e-mail me
today very important. Although, I understand how busy he is. But he should
please understand my position too.
Thanks for everything and
God bless you.
Mrs. Judith Kante
From Mrs. Kante to Father Tuchme (6/2)
Attn: Father Will U. Tuchme,
Your Holiness,
I am very confused and disturbed
that i have not heard from you since two days.
Although sister Anita has
written me twice since then and mentioned you were. I really mentioned how important
it is for me to hear from you especially on the name that will be on the
certificate of deposit. But like i told you, i have already given the fiance
company last week to change the deposit certificate to DR. WILLIAM U. TUCHME
address as New York United State of America.
You can see as attached that
i have just received from trans-atlantic world wide securityes & Fiance the
certificate of deposit. Please the best thing now is for you to make arrangement
to come to Thailand and meet with the security managing Director, Mr. Koffi Swith
. As I was told by the security company , it will cost a little more money because
of your flight ticket and hotel expences including payment of demurrages which
i believe the cost is going to be more expensinces in the alternative,
i should have to suggested we ask the finance company to make a direct wire-transfer
to your account in united states or anywhere you may have an account that is
more convenient for you . in alternative, what the finance company may require
is a little tax on demurrage which is not going to be more in our side
, so ofcourse the choice is yours.
Please let me know your position
about this immediately. The delay is replying my mail makes me feel so
bad . please i will know your position . please say hi to sister Anita.
May God bless you, your holiness.
Your sister - in - the Lord
- Mrs . Judith Kante
From Father
Tuchme to Mrs. Kante (6/2)
My
dearest Mrs. Kante:
I
must firstly apologize for my lateness of reply, but I have been extremely busy
with a few things. Firstly, I have had many young, sick boys to pray for individually.
Secondly, I had a day out at the lake with some of the young boys of my diocese.
It was beautiful to see the lads frolicking about shirtless. Then when we went
for a dip in the lake, their pert, peachlike rumps reminded me of the beauty
of nature and the water. I have also been preparing for my impending Vatican
trip to meet with his Holiness, the Pope, regarding the Touching Cloth diocese.
As you are aware, Sundays are extremely busy: I have to arrange and prepare my
sermon for the congregation. With all of the recent difficulties in the church,
I must be extremely careful in my actions, especially due to the accusations
of spiking the grape juice. That is an area where Sister Anita Hanchob is my
most staunch ally. Her knowledge of the law combined with her unrelenting prayer
protects and nourishes the Touching Cloth diocese.
Speaking
of which, I am glad that you have had contact with Sister Hanchob. She is sometimes
batty due to her age, but she is a spitfire and, as she puts it, prays like hell.
When I first mentioned this transaction to her, we held hands and prayed. She
said she needed time to pray alone, so I went and prayed with a young boy named
Steven. When we reconvened, she said it was safe as you were not Nigerian; you
are from Sierra Leone. She said never to trust transactions with Nigerians. Anyway,
that photograph of her surfing the Internet is very funny. Actually, she recently
sent it to a humorous website and they published it! She is a crazy old bird,
but infused with the love of the Lord.
My
dear Judith, I have seen your photograph and you are a serious looking lady.
I do pray for your happiness, and for the happiness of your son after all that
you have experienced. I understand that you wish for me to come to Bangkok and
meet with your representative. This is a trip I could manage at the end of my
Vatican visit. Could you send me details of a hotel and airport? I see by your
Certificate of deposit that things are moving along nicely. I am most trusting.
There are a few things that I am unclear of/hesitant about. Firstly, is SARS
a problem? I do not want SARS. Secondly, what were you talking about regarding
taxes and money, please explain.
I
trust, if I do make it to Bangkok to secure this transaction, that I will be
met at the airport. Would you tell me who will be meeting me and send me a photograph
of the individual meeting me. I do trust you, Judith, but I am usually wary.
To prove this is all real and to extinguish the last doubt from my mind will
you send me a photograph of the individual meeting me holding a sign with my
name on it? It must read "Father Will U. Tuchme." I know this is silly,
but it will prove to me that the person I am meeting is real and not just a random,
meaningless picture.
In
hope of your prompt response and wishing you the virtues of the lord himself,
I
am,
Father
Will U. Tuchme
From Mrs. Kante
to Father Tuchme (6/3)
Your Holiness,
Thank you for your mail.
I understand you are usually busy and do appreciate you need to reply my mail
promptly. As long as you have complete confidence in me, I will be at your service
and do everything required of me to make this transaction successful. Because
without the success of this business, it then means I have to suffer with my
only kid all the rest of our lives.
In respect of your coming,
I will be in touch with the Finance Company tomorrow and I would give them all
your details. I am sure they will be in contact with you and they will let you
know who will be coming to meet with you at the Airport. They will as well forward
such representative photograph.
Your Holiness, we don’t
have any SARS problem over here. It is only in China that the problem exist and
even in China the Government is controlling the epidemic. So don’t entertain
any fear about SARS, you are safe.
Regarding your concern about
taxes and money, I was trying to explain what the Finance Company told me. They
said if we require this fund to be sent directly to your account, they will have
to change a tax on it but since you are coming over there, they taxes cannot
be applied. All you are required to do is to pay demurrage and handling charges.
They will explain more to you when you open communication with them prior to
your arrival in Bangkok. The hotel reservation will be made as soon as you indicate
your arrival time.
Please tell Sister Anita
to send me an email because I have been longing to hear from her these days and
as well ask her to always pray for me and my little kid.
Thanks and remain blessed.
Your Sister – in – the
Lord.
Mrs. Judith Kante.
From Father
Tuchme to Mrs. Kante (6/3)
Dearest
Mrs. Kunte:
I
do enjoy our e-mails, especially since you are a lady of God. Did Sister Hanchob
inform me correctly that you are devout Catholic? I am hoping so. I pray nightly
for the happiness of you, your son, and Sister Hanchob. Last night, in my study
of the holy scripture, I read a passage that I believe is appropriate. I quote
this with you in mind:
And
thus, Jesus spake unto his desciples that gathered around him so. "And as
I sit upon thine turtle's head, I will surely toucheth cloth."
--Iziah
4:19
This
passage is reflective of Jesus' own desire to touch the sacred cloth of his people,
and as a man of the cloth, it has become the reason for the name of my diocese.
Are you one to touch cloth Mrs. Kante? I sincerely hope so.
As
I mentioned, I am trusting of you, my dear. I just have several lingering tagnuts
of doubt. I would like very much to be in touch with your security company and
begin the formalities. I am serious about seeing the person who will be meeting
me at the airport. And I am also serious that to prove his or her identity, they
must send me a photograph of themselves holding a sign that reads "Father
Will U. Tuchme." They can then carry this sign to the airport when they
meet me. Will I be meeting you too, Mrs. Kante? I certainly hope so.
I
am glad that SARS is not a problem in Bangkok, you have assuaged my fears in
regards to this. Will I be able to meet many people in Bangkok? I was hoping
to do some missionary work with young children--especially boys. Please let me
know if this can be arranged.
Regarding
money for the transaction taxes and the such, I will bring plenty of American
Express traveller's checks, amounting to several thousands of dollars. However,
a much better idea will be to have you pay any fees out of the secured funds.
I
will have Sister Anita contact you at once, and I will continue to pray for your
happiness and prosperity.
In
honest love and with faith in the Lord our Father,
I
remain,
Father
Will U. Tuchme
From Mrs. Kante
to Father Tuchme (6/4)
Your Holiness,
Thanks for your kind words.
I also enjoy reading your mail especially your love for children. Also, thanks
for the trust you repose in me. Yes, I am a devout Catholic, which stated very
early in my life. My late husband was a Knight of Mulumba. God loves me and I
do my best to reflect God’s love on everybody I meet. I will be the one
to touch cloth, your Holiness.
I am glad to know that you
are ready to be in touch with the Security Company and begin formalities. Your
Holiness, there is no problem with the person that will receive you at the Airport.
Their photograph will be sent to you. They will carry a sign reading “Father
Will U. Tuchme. I believe I will be at the Airport also to receive you depending
where I’m camping. About the young children in Bangkok for your missionary
work, you know I am like a refuge over there, but I will try to arrange something
through my friends and see how possible that can be.
You Holiness as regards the
expenses please be assured that whatever you spend will be deducted from the
secure funds. The Security Company does not have the power to deduct from the
Secured funds because of the clause my Husband put on deposit, neither do I have
personal money as such, given my status. Therefore, your idea to come with
American Express Travellers checks is a very good one. It will be very helpful
in meeting the miscellaneous expenses.
Meanwhile, this is to inform
you that in view of the change of name on the Certificate of Deposit, the entire
transaction has been signed off to your name and person by my son and myself.
Thanks and God Bless.
Judith Kante.
From Mrs.
Kante to Father Tuchme (6/4)
Your Holiness,
Thanks for your kind words.
I also enjoy reading your mail especially your love for children. Also, thanks
for the trust you repose in me. Yes, I am a devout Catholic, which stated very
early in my life. My late husband was a Knight of Mulumba. God loves me and I
do my best to reflect God’s love on everybody I meet. I will be the one
to touch cloth, your Holiness.
I am glad to know that you
are ready to be in touch with the Security Company and begin formalities. Your
Holiness, there is no problem with the person that will receive you at the Airport.
Their photograph will be sent to you. They will carry a sign reading “Father
Will U. Tuchme. I believe I will be at the Airport also to receive you depending
where I’m camping. About the young children in Bangkok for your missionary
work, you know I am like a refuge over there, but I will try to arrange something
through my friends and see how possible that can be.
You Holiness as regards the
expenses please be assured that whatever you spend will be deducted from the
secure funds. The Security Company does not have the power to deduct from the
Secured funds because of the clause my Husband put on deposit, neither do I have
personal money as such, given my status. Therefore, your idea to come with
American Express Travellers checks is a very good one. It will be very helpful
in meeting the miscellaneous expenses.
Meanwhile, this is to inform
you that in view of the change of name on the Certificate of Deposit, the entire
transaction has been signed off to your name and person by my son and myself.
Thanks and God Bless.
Judith Kante.
From Mrs. Kante to
Sister Anita Hanchob (6/4)
Dear Sister Anita,
Greetings in the Name of
Our Lord Jesus Christ.
I hope all is well with you.
I was a little weak when I have not heard from you in the last 3 days and this
is to ask after your health and know whether all is well and that your silence
is not a result of poor health.
This is to further express
my gratitude to God for His assistance and harkening to my prayer through His
Holiness Father Will.
We have been in contact with
each other and I am grateful that he is willing to go to Bangkok to actualize
this transaction.
His request as to how he
will be received at the Airport will be met and he will not have any problem
recognising the persons who receive him there. The Security Company is arranging
that and I am sure they will do all the necessary to ensure the request of His
Holiness.
Thank you for everything
and God bless you.
Mrs. Judith Kante.
From TransAtlantic
to Father Tuchme (6/4)
Attn: Mr. William Tuchme.
Your address was given to
us by Mr Des K. Annan in respect of the consinment deposited in the name of Mrs.
Judith Kante, we are pleased to inform you that the consignment is with
us, we have already notified the beneficiary to prepare for our handling charges
which must be paid before releasing the cargo to him, we assured you of safe
delievery to your address in Thailand.
Thanks for your co-operation.
Ouadrago Patipon.
For: Transatlantic World
Wide Security.
From Father Tuchme
to Ouadrago from TransAtlantic (6/4)
Dear
Sir/Madam:
I
assume that you are the security company I am supposed to meet in Bangkok,however,
your e-mail is most unprofessional. For a start, I am sure that Mrs. Judith Kante
has introduced me and told you how to correctly address me. I am not a Mr., I
work for a living. I am a doctor and a Reverend Bishop. Therefore, I am to be
addressed Father William U. Tuchme or Dr. Tuchme. In regards to this arrangement,
you may call me Father Will U. Tuchme.
Secondly,
who in the Lord's creation is Des K. Annan? I have never heard this name from
Mrs. Kante.
Thirdly,
is your name Ouadrago Patipon, and what do I have to do with you to get my shipment?
I am sure Mrs. Kante has told you that I will be in Bangkok shortly after my
impending trip to the Vatican this weekend. She has informed me that somebody
from your company will be there at the airport to meet me. However, I will not
arrange this trip until I am sent a photograph of the individual meeting me.
To prove that this photograph is recent and honest the individual must be holding
a sign that has my name on it in the photograph. The sign must read "Father
Will U. Tuchme." This sign can also be brought to the airport when I am
met. This is a small step to take to assuage my fears. I trust you will comply.
After all, I will be travelling with several thousand dollars worth of travellers'
checks and am obviously nervous.
I
expect your prompt reply and photograph.
Sincerely,
in the name of our blessed Lord,
Father
Will U. Tuchme
From Father
Tuchme to Mrs. Kante (6/4)
Dear
Mrs. Kante:
As
I sit down this morning to be at peace with the Lord, I am filled with a spirit
of kindness and light. You are a sincere and honest individual, and one who is
also at peace with the Lord. I sensed from our first e-mail that you were a Catholic,
and even moreso, that you touch cloth. I just knew it. You have filled me with
happiness.
I
did hear from your security company and as you can see by my reply which I forwarded
to you. I am not sure they are very professional. However, I do trust you so
I will take your advice. Am I dealing with them correctly? Please advise. I hope
that soon we will both feel the benefits of our association.
Mrs.
Kante, as you know the photograph is very important to me. I am a little nervous
about travelling with large sums of travellers checks. I need to see a picture
of the individual who will be meeting me holding a sign with my name on it. It
should read "Father Will U. Tuchme." I am leaving for my trip to the
Vatican on Saturday. I am provisionally booking flights to Bangkok, but I will
not confirm unless I recieve this picture in the next 36 hours. By the way, is
$3000 enough to bring in travellers' checks. Please advise. I am sure we can
arrange something about the funding for the modalities.
Sister
Anita will be in touch with you soon. I worry for her health. She is aged and
frail. Infact, she has been resting for the last few days. She came into my study
for daily prayer and in the middle of our meditation she touched cloth. The sensation
was so vigorous that she has been resting since. How powerful the Lord is. I
fear too powerful for Sister Anita to bear.
I
would appreciate it if you could look into missionary work I could do with small
children while I am there. It would fill me with joy.
Please
explain the change of name on the Certificate of Deposit. I am a little confused.
May
the Lord's love be with you, I expect your prompt response as time is short.
Sincerely,
Father
Will U. Tuchme
From Sister Hanchob
to Mrs. Kante (6/6)
Hi
Judith,
It's
Sister Anita Hanchob. I wanted to touch base with you and let you know
that Father Tuchme had to postpone his trip. I want to stress to you how
important it is that Father Tuchme have his requests, demands, fantasies fulfilled. For
what he will do for you, it’s a small price to pay. Due to the fact
that the Catholic Church is the most powerful religion in the world (and most
pure I might add), we have to continuously watch our backs. Do you know
what I’m saying G? There are those who want to take down the church
and kill the priests. I know what you are thinking, “that’s
sick, why would anyone want to stand out at an airport and shoot a God fearing
priest as he comes off the plane?” Well, it happens. More often
then you think Judith. As traveling Catholics, we have standard operating
procedures that we have to follow when meeting potential business partners. God
forces us to follow these strictly or we face his wrath. Please provide
us with the names and places, along with the picture of the pick-up man holding
that sign. I’m sure this won’t be a problem. You obviously
complied with the standard operating procedure of the Catholic Church before. I'm
very busy today so I might not get back to email till Monday. Well, I’m
off to go stand out in front of the planed parenthood with my sign and throw
eggs at the young women who don’t think the right way, the Catholic way.
Talk
to you soon.
Sister
Anita Hanchob
From Mrs. Kante to
Sister Anita Hanchob (6/7)
Dear Sister Anita,
Thank you for your mail.
i completely understand your concern for His Holiness, and I want to use this
oppotunity to reassure you that I can never be part of anything that will harm
the man of God. Even as i suffer everyday to feed my son. I live with the fear
of God. In God I put all my trust. I won't want to offend God because on the
Judgement day, I want to be in Heaven.
Sister Anita, have no doubt
about Father Tuchme safety, they shall send the photograph of the person that
will receive His Holiness at the Airport as requested by Father. I very much
understand the operating procedures of traveling Catholics and must ensure that
they comply with the rules.
Sister Anita, everything
is fine. I won't let you or Father down because you are my only hope of a future
for me and my son.
May God bless you abundantly
in your desire for a better society for all of us.
Your Sister -in- Christ,
Mrs. Judith Kante.
Des Kwame
Annan to Father Tuchme (6/7)
Dear Father Will
U. Tuchme.
Good day, this is the third
time I'm sending message to you without response from you, though I can understand
your carefullness, however I need more details inofrmation from you hence
Mrs. Judith Kante have briefed me your details of coming, I have sent the
required information to you but to my surprise, Madam told me that you have not
recieved it, here is the detail information for your coming, Mr. Isaac
Khunga whom the picture is attarched here will recieve you at the airport with
the sign, Fathe Will U. Tuchme, he will take very good care of you while
you are here, the hotel reservation will be made for you as soon as you confirm
your date of coming, kindly indicate to me your choice of Hotel, the company
informed me that we have total demorrage of $37,850 to balance them, this amount
must be paid to them before delievering the consignment to us. with this arrangement
the transaction will be concluded within two days of your coming.
I look forward for your response.
Regards.
Des Kwame Annan.
From Mrs.
Kante to Father Tuchme (6/7)
His Holliness,
It's nice hearing from you
once again. I completely read you detailed mail and I understood every bit of
your mail.
First and formost, I can
never be a party for any wrong to happen to a man of God. I completely resolved
with my God to fully trust you and I will do everything in this world to protect
your interest and the interst of Catholic Church. I am sure that at the end of
my life, I have an answer, for my God to account fpr all my deeds in the world.
Because of this, I will never never be a party to anything devilish. What I hate
in my life is human being to doubt me or don't have trust in me. It makes me
feel like dying. That's the only word I told my husband before I married him.
I told him about trust. Even now that he has passed on, I still maintains that
trust of not disappointing him.
Please your Holiness, reassure
me your confidence and trust for I will not disappoint you. Instead of misleading
you, I rather stay hungry and suffer the way am suffering, please take my directions.
(1). There was a mix-up about
Isaac Khunga and Desmond Anna. Let me explain.
Desmond Anna is somebody
appointed to assist you until the whole transaction is over within the few days
you would be in Bangkok. So, feel free with him because he is well known to me.
While Isaac Khunga is a personal assistance to Desmond Anna. And he is the person
that his photograph will be sent to you and he is the one to receive you at the
airport. these are the only two people you would be dealing with.
In respect of the amount
you were asked to bring by the Security Company, please your Holiness, I want
you to know that I have no control over it. Two months ago they wrote me a letter
informing me of the demurrage and handling charges, but I never knew that it
will amount to this kind of money. Before sending this money out, please deduct
whatever the amount spent including your travelling and hotel expenses before
the disbursement and possible investments. Well, I don't know if you are going
to do it, but please do whatever you can to help conclude this transaction.
This is the sweat of my Husband.
We passed through hell.
Your Holiness, I am looking
forward to touching cloth by the Grace of God. Please reassure Sister Anita of
your safety. I will not be a party for anything to harm a man of God especially
somebody like you.
May Almighty God Bless your
Lordship. Till I hear from you.
Your Sister in Christ,
Mrs. Judith Kante.
From Mrs. Kante to
Father Tuchme (6/9)
Your Holiness,
Greetings in the name of
Jesus.
How is Sister Anita? I sent
a mail to Sister Anita inquiring after her health. I also sent you a mail on
the same day Saturday last week.
Please confirm if you have
received the photograph of Mr. Isaac Khunga with the placard and with the
inscription on it as requested by you. This is because they have copied me with
that photograph and I forwarded same to you on Saturday the 7th of June 2003.
Uptil this moment I am yet to receive a confirmation/acknowledgement to that
effect.
I am still waiting to hear
from you and possibly your traveling program to Bangkok.
May Almighty God Bless your
Lordship.
Yours faithfully,
Mrs. Judith Kante.
From Sister Hanchob
to Mrs. Kante (6/9)
Hi
Mrs. Kante,
How
are you my dear? I am fine. I understand you completely and know
that you would never let God down. God has a special place for you, I just
know it. Hell is reserved for those who do wrong, like lie, kill, cheat,
steal, masturbate, and act badly. You don’t do those things so you
will be rewarded. You, like myself, are a woman of Godsmack. I, stand
alone, before the lord, and say, “I’m not the one who’s so
far away.” I’m excited to go on this journey with you and Father
Touchme. We will join forces and help you. When we are done with
that, you will help us in our plan to make Catholicism the only religion in the
world. Total freaking dominance. The Catholic plan, if you will.
Father
Tuchme told me to tell you he received the picture. Good job. He
will be in touch. Jesus will be carrying us like a bush in a tree.
Talk
to you soon,
Sister
Anita Hanchob
Des Kwame Annan
to Father Tuchme (6/8)
Dear Father Will U.
Tuchme.
Good day, this is the third
time I'm sending message to you without response from you, though I can understand
your carefullness, however I need more details inofrmation from you hence
Mrs. Judith Kante have briefed me your details of coming, I have sent the
required information to you but to my surprise, Madam told me that you have not
recieved it, here is the detail information for your coming, Mr. Isaac
Khunga whom the picture is attarched here will recieve you at the airport with
the sign, Fathe Will U. Tuchme, he will take very good care of you while you
are here, the hotel reservation will be made for you as soon as you confirm your
date of coming, kindly indicate to me your choice of Hotel, the company informed
me that we have total demorrage of $37,850 to balance them, this amount must
be paid to them before delievering the consignment to us. with this arrangement
the transaction will be concluded within two days of your coming. I look
forward for your response.
Regards.
Des Kwame Annan.
From Mrs. Kante
to Sister Hanchob (6/11)
Dear Sister Anita,
Thank you for your beautiful
mail. I am glad to know that Father Tuchme liked the picture. I made sure
that they do
exactly what Father Tuchme
wants.
Sister Anita, I must tell
you this is my only opportunity to have a great future for me and my son, so
I will do everything possible to comply with father Tuchme instructions.
God is on my side because
I will always do anything in this world to satisfy my God. Please tell His Holiness
that I am anxiously would like to know when he is coming to Thailand. At least
if I don’t have anything, I will arrange a beautiful flower to present
to him.
Remain blessed in the Lord.
Your Sister – in -
the – Lord.
Judith Kante.
From Father
Tuchme to Des Kwame Annan CC to Mrs. Kante (6/11)
My
dearest friends and children under the weight of the Lord:
I
am very sorry for the delay in my response. My Internet connection was temporarily
removed as my computer was searched by Church officials. Thank God for Zip disks,
where I keep my most important... documents. I have also been extremely busy.
Sister Anita has told me of your correspondence which fills me with a spirit
so intense that I Touch Cloth immediately when I think about it. I have also
received the picture of Mr. Isaac Khunga, who will be meeting me at the airport
in Bangkok. He is a very handsome young man, is he Catholic? Does he Touch Cloth?
This
weekend I was at retreat with many of the young boys of my Diocese. I frequently
take them to Turtle's Head Island in Morning Wood, New York. I hope that one
day, when this transaction is secured, we can all be together in such a place
in peace and under the eye of the lord.
I
have some wonderful news. I am investigating flights to Bangkok for next week.
As of yet I have not solidified anything due to not being quite sure of my Vatican
Visit. I am planning to arrive on Wednesday June the 18th. Will this be appropriate?
The good news is that I will be bringing Sister Anita with me! She does not know
yet, but I wished to make it a surprise; she does love to fly.
This
leads me onto one more thing. Your photograph did mean so much to me and it did
prove that you are serious about all of this. I am securing $40,000 of my personal
funds from a couple of websites I own, and will have this converted to Travelers'
Checks. This is to handle the taxes and demurrage charges. (I understand that
this will be reimbursed when the transaction is completed, right?). To surprise
Sister Anita, can I ask you one more favor? It is also a bit of a necessity for
church law. Would you have one more picture taken, and this time have the sign
read "Father Will U. Tuchme and Sister Anita Hanchob." This will make
her day! How much do these photographs cost, by the way? I will be more than
happy to reimburse the cost.
I
will be back in touch later today with more specific details of flights. Please
do work on that picture as soon as possible. It really will be a great surprise
for Sister Anita and we need a copy for our church archives, anyway.
In
hope that you will forgive me for my lateness of reply and that the Lord will
keep us all blessed,
I
remain,
Father
Will U. Tuckme
P.S.
I noted that Mr. Desmond says he tried to e-mail several times. This is the first
one I received from him.
P.P.S. Please
don't tell Anita about the surprise!
rom Mrs. Kante
to Sister Hanchob (6/12)
Dear father,
Thanks in Jesus name for
your mail. It was such an enlivening piece of mail.
This is in consonance with
my dream of the woman with the issue of blood, who upon touching the hem of Lord’s
garment, got instantly healed. I had this dream a day before yesterday. Once
I had the dream, I woke up in the middle of the night and recited my rosary in
praise, knowing that with you by my side, my predicament is over. Praise the
Lord!
Yes, Saturday the 18th of
June as your arrival date is fine. I think for now this remains tentative, until
you have it confirmed from the airline, which hopefully you will communicate
to me as soon as you are Okayed.
Meanwhile, I am going to
Sattahip for an interview to formalize my refugee status. Sattahip is a port
city in Thailand. Once I return, I shall take another photograph and forward
to you. The cost of the photographs is not so much of a problem, though I have
little or no discretional funds at my disposal.
As instructed, I shall keep
your intention to take sister Anita with you, away from her, till you surprise
her yourself. What a pleasant surprise it will be.
I wait eagerly for your confirmation
of your flight schedule later today.
Goodbye and may the peace
of the Lord which passes all understanding continue to be with you and Sister
Anita.
Yours in Christ,
Mrs. Judith Kante.
From Father
Tuchme to Mrs. Kante (6/12)
Dear
Mrs. Kante:
I
am refreshed to back in contact with you. It has been so long. Your dream of
touching cloth has brought tears to my eyes. I pray that you will always touch
cloth.
I
have booked airfare tickets for myself and Sister Anita. We will be travelling
first class. Here are the details:
We
are flying British Airways for the duration of the trip. We will fly from New
York to London first.
BA
9
London
to Bangkok
Departing
Tuesday, June 17th at 10:30 PM
Arriving
in Bangkok Wednesday, June 18th at 4:00 PM
We
will be leaving on Wednesday the 25th. Does this give us enough time?
I
will book us into a suite at the Bangkok Marriott, Riverside. Is this a nice
hotel?
Please,
Mrs. Kante, I would very much like to recieve the second picture and am very
glad you will tend to it after your business. I am also very interested in doing
missionary position work with young boys there. I know you will help. Sister
Anita will touch cloth when she sees the picture of the sign with her name on
it too! Don't you think it will be a lovely way to suprise her?
I
am thrilled that we will be able to stand together under the Lord's blessing.
Until that day,
I
am,
Father
Will U. Tuchme
P.S.
Please make sure that his is Ok with Mr. Des Anna. I have misplaced his address.
P.P.S.
I would like to bring gifts for you all. What would you like to receive?
Sister Hanchob
to Mrs. Kante (6/12)
Dear
Mrs. Kante,
Beset
the lord by which he walks upon, armed with nothing but a stone and a hair pick. May
he play his enemies like a game of chess. He who walks behind the roads
can kill one stone and two birds. Rub a dud, thank you Lord for the grub.
You
will have to excuse me as I am extremely tired. I took a Vicatin and had
a Mimosa. How are you my dear? I walked in on the Father's booth
in confession yesterday. I had to make it quick because I interrupted him
and little Timmy. Father was consoling him and was nice enough to get in
Timmy's side of the booth with him and let Jesus speak to him. Not Jesus
Rodriquez, the church janitor, but the real deal. He told me that he has
written you and things are going as planed. Right on.
I
pray for you dear. Every freaking day. I pray. I know everything
is going to be all right because it is the way God wants it.
Praying
like a mother.
Sister
Anita Hanchob
From Des Kwame
to Father Tuchme 6/12)
Dear Father Will U.
Tuchme.
Good day, I recieved information
from Madam about your arrival date, kindly reconfirm to us again to enable me
make neccesary arrangement of recieving you at the airport, Mr. Isaac Khunga
will be around to recieve you on your arrival, however I dont think there is
need of adding extra name on the sign with him, you will identify him with the
Sign, Father Will U, Tuchme. the hotel you mentioned is okay though I have not
been there before, in Thailand you will contact me with this Phone number 017455201
but if you are calling from State, 66-1-7455201. I look forward to meet
you in Thailand.
Regards.
From Mrs. Kante to
Father Tuchme (6/13)
Your Holiness,
Whatever you dream that is
good for me, that will be very fine. I really on't want to borther you. You have
done much to my life already. I will be looking forward in seeing you in
Bangkok. Have a very wonderful
day and remain blessed.
Yours sincerely,
Mrs Judith Kante.
From Father
Tuchme to Mrs. Kante (6/13)
My
dear Mrs. Kante:
I
am always thrilled to hear from you. I too am looking forward to seeing you in
Bangkok with Sister Anita at my side, however, I am most perplexed by the behaviour
of your collegue, Mr. Desmond Anna. I received e-mail from him within which he
seems somewhat sly and mysterious. It almost makes me feel like he is playing
a game with me. This is no reflection of my feelings towards you--I know you
would not play any sort of games with me--but I feel like he is just after my
money, perhaps he is.
It
is time for total truth between us. You have a large sum of money that you need
to release before you can live a fulfilling life. Please remind me as to the
ammount. If I come to Bangkok and invest $40,000, I will receive a percentage.
(can you let me know how much I will get again?) I am also paying a great deal
of money for first class airline tickets for me and Sister Anita. Why will Desmond
Anna not do me the simple courtesy of providing another picture of Isaac Kwumba
holding a sign with both Sister Anita's
and my name on it? He claims it is not necessary when I have already told him
it is. I need it for Sister Anita to travel (for church law) and to surprise
her. If I am to invest, I expect this small courtesy. Inform Mr. Anna that my
tickets are fully refundable and I can cancel at any time. Please
advise.
I
have decided on the perfect gift for you. A pearl necklace! If I can spend time
with you, I would like to put it on you myself. I could also display it on nice
pink jewelers cushions if you prefer.
In
the lord and with the gift of his blessings,
I
am,
Father
Will U. Tuchme
From
Des Kwame to Father Tuchme 6/13)
EBOLA
MONKEY
NOTE: She obviously didn't get the point of the pearl
necklace.
Dear Father Will
U. Tuchme.
Good day, here is another
picture with the required Identification, the Name of the person to recieve
you at the airport is Isaac Khunga, kindly reconfirm you arrival time so that
he will be they early to recieve you. I look forward to meet you
and Sister Anita in Thailand.
Best Regards.
Des Kwame Annan
EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: I FUCKING LOVE THIS GUY!
From
Mrs. Kante to Father Tuchme (6/13)
Your Holiness,
Thank you for the confidence
and trust you have in me. I am overwhelmed with joy for your kindness to beautify
me with a pearl necklace. That this is gift is coming from you makes it very
special to me because it's a blessing. Father,precious tears of joy is
flowing from my eyes.
I received your letter and
was greatly disappointed with Desmond Anna. I just felt like the world is collapsing
on me. Your holiness, how can I miss the only opportunity I have to secure a
brilliant future. Honestly, if I miss this chance, I would remain unhappy for
the rest of my life.
I have already gotten in
touch with Desmond Anna and expressed your dissatisfaction with him. He was very
apologetic. Please forgive him, father. He is a perfect christian gentleman.
he can never play game with you. Perhaps, he misunderstand you. I have made him
realise that you are not an ordinary citizen, I told him you are a respected
clergy in the world, therefore he must be extremely humble and co-operative with
you. He has promised to be respectful and to comply with all your directives.
He will also pay you all the courtesy you deserve. father, my knees are on the
floor. Please don't be upset. Remember you are doing everything for my sake,
we need him because he is playing a big role in this transaction. Have patience
with him, he would send the photograph
immediately.
As per your parcentage, you
would receive 40% of $28,500,000.00 (Twenty- Eight Million, Five Hundred Thousand
United State dollars). You are investing a great time and money, so you deserve
a good percentage.
Your holiness, please let
me know when you receive the photograph. Remember I am your daughter in the Lord.
You are all I have, I am ever willing to provide you with answers to all your
questions.
My regards to sister Anita.
I wouldn't want to write sister Anita now because I don't want to make the mistake
of disclosing the surprise package you have for her.
I expect to hear from you.
Your daughter in the Lord,
Judith Kante.
From
Mrs. Kante to Sister Hanchob 2 emails in a row (6/16)
Dear Sister Anita,
I actually received your
mail. I am sorry I delayed a little bit in replying. How is your present
condition of health? I hope you are getting better. God will always be there
for you. Did you touch cloth this last Sunday? Did his Holiness preside over
the mass and what was the Sermon.
His Holiness was very angry
with the behaviour of Desmond Ann. However, I did my best to talk to Desmond
to be very respeatful and courteous to Father. I believe by now everything is
okay. Please help me to talk to his holiness so that he will stop being angry.
Please advise his holiness that he should consider God and my position in all
his action. Everything will be okay.
I just wanted to know how
you are doing.
Remain blessed.
Your - Sister -in -the-Lord,
Mrs.Judith Kante.
EBOLA
MONKEY NOTE: Jesus lady, give me a chance to answer. Can't
she see I'm
busy touching the cloth?
Dear Sister Anita,
I have not heard from you
or father.What is happening?Is everything alright with you people?Is father still
coming to Thailand?I wrote you an email today and up till this moment,I not heard
from any one of you and 'am not really comfortable with this situation.My concern
is if you people are in good health for that is my problem now.
Please,let somebody email
me so that I know what is happening.
Regards,
Mrs. Judith.
From
Mrs. Kante to Father Tuchme (6/16)
Dear father,
Since today I have not heard
from you. Is everything alright with you? How is sister Anita? Is she alright?
Please let me know your present condition of health, it is very important I hear
from you, I am not comfortable any more.
Are you still coming to Thailand?
Please re-confirm.
Yours Truly,
Mrs Judith Kante.
Sister
Hanchob to Mrs. Kante (6/17)
Dear
Mrs. Kante,
Surprise! I'm
in London with Father Tuchme. I'm so excited that I'm coming with him. He
is always full of tricks and dicks. I can't believe I am actually going
to Bangkok, literally. We are coming to help you my dear. In the
flesh. I'm so happy, like the time I woke up to a white Christmas and Father
Tuchme was standing there. Hopefully we will be able to provide you with
relief.
When
the lord says "relief," we say together, "Sister Anita Hanchob!" This
is going to be great.
Sorry
I did not write sooner. I was touching the cloth on Sunday like you said. The
holiness did preside over the mass and performed the Erik Sermon solo, not the
EPMD.
The
father could never be angry at you my child. He just wants you to know
that he is the HNIC.
We
will see you soon.
With
the lord I cum,
Sister
Anita Hanchob
From
Father Tuchme to Mrs. Kante (6/17)
My
dearest Mrs. Kante:
Greetings
form London! I apologize immensely for not mailing before we left, but I was
so busy trying to leave and making arrangements such as incontinence pants for
Sister Anita. I received the photograph of Mr. Isaac and it was all that
I needed. Sister Anita was so suprised! A million thank yous are extended to
you all for this courtesy. Such a handsome man is Mr. Issac. I am sure that one
day he will be famous! I will work to make him so in my own humble way. I envision
his good looks on t-shirts and lunch boxes everywhere.
In
regards to Mr. Anna, I am sorry that I came across as overly criticle. I just
expect respect and cooperation in a deal of this magnitude. I look forward to
meeting you all tomorrow. Did you ever manage to arrange any missionary work
for me.
Sister
Anita and I are in a cyber cafe here in Heathrow airport. Our flight to Bangkok
leaves in several hours. I do despise layovers. It is:
BA
9
London
to Bangkok
Departing
Tuesday, June 17th at 10:30 PM
Arriving
in Bangkok Wednesday, June 18th at 4:00 PM
We
will arrive there in Thailand at 4:00PM local time. I do so hope you can be in
the airport. I have the travellers checks to pay the taxes and demmurage fees.
Please do not panic, my Dear Mrs Kunte, all will be well. I also have your pearl
necklace. I can't wait for you to wear it.
Until
we see you at the airport I will continue to pray with Sister Anita. She
tells me she just sent mail to you and now she is off to the duty free store
to buy bourbon and ciggarettes.
In
love and in your mother and in her mother before her with the blessings of the
Lord,
I
am,
Father
Will U. Tuchme
P.S.
We have not booked a hotel yet. I am sure we can arrange this when we arrive.
Please let us know.
P.P.S.
Please let Mr. Desmond know that we are still going to be there tomorrow.
From
Mrs. Kante to Sister Hanchob (6/18)
Dear Sister Anita,
Wow! You are in London. What
a thing of great joy. Indeed that was good of Father Tuchme. It was a pleasant
surprise. God will bless him.
I am greatly satisfied and
encouraged by your affection towards me. As you know, I have nobody else in the
world except my Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ and of course you and Father Tuchme.
Sister Anita, I’m sorry
to say that I wouldn’t be able to come to the Airport to receive you and
Father Tuchme. I took a trip to Sattahip, our refuge camp but unfortunately the
authority said I had used up my outing time for the month and that I can only
be permitted to go on outing in first week of July. I shed tears because I really
look forward to meeting with you and Father Tuchme at the Airport. But I’m
consoled by the fact that I will be meeting you and Father Tuchme in New York
by next month.
Please, please try to understand
my inability to be at the Airport. It is not my fault. We are refuges who are
under strict control.
Be assured that you and Father
Tuchme would be adequately taken care of by Mr. Desmond Anna and Mr. Isaac.
They are good Christians,
so feel safe and free with them.
God bless you.
Your sister – in – the – Lord.
Mrs. Judith Kante.
From
Father Tuchme to Mrs. Kante (6/18)
Dear
Mrs. Kante:
I
am most dissapointed, indeed. When we arrived in Bangkok, there was nobody waiting
to meet us at the airport. The only person holding a sign was a man dressed in
blue. The name on his sign was Mr. Bukkake. We waited and waited then eventually
took a taxi to the Marriott Hotel at 4 Sukhumvit Road, Soi 2.
We
were so exhausted after our flight and travelling that we went straight to our
rooms. Sister Anita is not well. I fear that the trip has taken much out of her.
We
are very dissapointed. I expect to meet your contacts in the Marriott Cafe' for
breakfast at 10.00 AM. Instruct your peons not to call as we will be sleeping
as much as possible. Should we not be on time, go ahead and have breakfast. I
will allow you to sign the bill to my room.
You
have created a terrible mess. I am tired and wounded by the lack of courtesy.
Already several business men have inquired as to my money and commodities. I
could always find another partner.
Sincerely,
Father
Will U. Tuchme
P.S.
I will see your men in the morning.
EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: Lets see how happy they are when we don't show.
From
Mrs. Kante to Father Tuchme (6/18)
Dear Father Will,
Greetings in Jesus Name!
How is Sister Anita? Please Father; Mr.Khunga and Desmond informed me a
while ago that after waiting for you at the Airport, they did not se you.
Why? Were you not on the
flight as you had confirmed to me earlier? I am confused. Kindly get back to
me with the situation of things by return mail NOW. I am afraid, your safety
and well being is my paramount concern.
I am really worried, and
your immediate reply will assuage my fear.
Meanwhile, DO NOT GIVE ANY
MONEY TO ANYBODY WITH OUT HEARING FROM ME FIRST, FOR CONFIRMATION.
Father please, please I am
waiting.
Regards,
Mrs. Judith Kante.
From Mrs.
Kante to Father Tuchme (6/18)
Your Holiness,
Kindly give me the telephone
number of that Hotel.
Please Father, DO NOT ALLOW
ANYBODY TO COME INTO YOUR LIFE THERE. BEACUSE I WOULDN'T WANT ANY REASON FOR
YOU TO BLAME ME.
I am terribly wounded and
disappointed myself if you check the time now, you will find out that I have
not slept I have been really down and despair. And I am not going to rest until
this fund is moved out of Bangkok, while you are still there.
I think what they are want
me to do was to deposit it with them so that they will make so much interest
of it and probally shortchnage me out of it.
Please your Holines, do not
allow this to happen to your daughter. You are already out to assist me. Please
do not go back at this time, because of this little disappointment.
Me and my son count on you.
Yours sister in Christ,
Mrs. Judith Kante.
PROFANATOR NOTE: You can almost hear the desperation! I love it!
From Mrs.
Kante to Father Tuchme (6/19)
Your Holiness,
It is with a sorrowful heart
that I write you this letter. I am still in a state of shock as to why Desmond
Anna could have disrespected your Holiness. Well, he has lost the only blessing
he would have received from the man of God. He will never get another opportunity.
I remember you foresaw his
sly attitude and you alerted me but I never knew that this man never wanted my
progress in life. Shame to him forever. Father if you love me and want to wipe
away tears from my eyes, you have to forget him entirely and help me with this
transaction.
Father, I hope you received
my instructions yesterday. I have already applied to Pacific Bank Plc for the
transfer of this money and I am in regular contact with them. Mr.Koffi Smith
who introduced me to Desmond Anna is solidly behind me and is working very hard
to make sure that this transfer is successful. Father, please I’m
on my knees, please stay for only 48 hours so that this transaction will be concluded.
I know the bank wants to make profit on this money by having it deposited with
them for sometime. But father, we won’t let them. The money has to be transferred
out immediately to US. I am asking a lot of questions and people are advising me continuously.
I am 250 miles from where you are, so the only way I can communicate with you
now is by e-mail. Your Holiness it is expected that everything about this transaction
will be concluded within the next 48 hours. Everything in under control. I shall
send you the transfer slip before you depart for US. Please do not have
anything to do with Desmond Anna; he is a big disappointment to have treated
you with disrespect. Indeed, in my country we call Bishop Our Lord. I can’t
imagine him treating you with no courtesy. I now know he is not a true Catholic
because all Catholics all over the world respect Bishops and Rev.Fathers. He
will regret his action for the rest of his life. I wish I were there to give
him a piece of my mind.
I can imagine how terribly
inconvenienced and let down it has been for you and Sister Anita. Honestly, I
have not had a good sleep since I heard about this disappointment. But God is
not asleep. He will come to my aid. I remember what God said in the Book of Proverbs
3:5 that we must not learn on our own understanding but rather we should trust
him completely with all our worries.
There is nothing greater
than God. With him all things are possible. I am greatly annoyed with Desmond.
I won’t curse him but I pray that one day one of their mothers will be
a widow so that they will know how it feels to be a widow.
Your Holiness, I want the
money transferred directly to you in US. Your trip will never be a waste. I know
and appreciate what it takes for a person of your exalted position to leave United
States, thousands of miles to Visit Bangkok. I must ensure that you have a rewarding
journey. Your Holiness, there is no good journey that goes straight. At the end
of the day we will all rejoice.
Please start using your 40%
of the money until I come over to the US. You are all I have and I trust you
completely. Sleep well Your Holiness. God will bless you and Sister Anita. I
will be in constant touch with you.
Your daughter in the Lord,
Mrs. Judith Kante
From
Father Tuchme to Mrs. Kante (6/19)
Mrs.
Kante:
Please
help us.
Nobody
met us for breakfast this morning, so Sister Anita suggested that we check out
the sights in Bangkok. Needless to say Sister Anita was so overcome by mid morning
that she collapsed in the street. I have been by her side at the hospital since
then. She is non responsive and all I can do is pray.
We
came here with the sweetest of intentions and now my beloved Sister lies recumbent
in illness. The upset and stress over not being met at the airport and being
given the run about has enflamed Sister's acute angina--and when she was young,
she didn't have a bad pair of shirt potatoes either.
To
add to it all, you are now claiming that you will wire the money to my account!!??
How can you do this when the whole idea of me coming here was to release the
money to which you had no access. Answer me that. Are you lying to me?
I
am back at my hotel changing cloths. I expect you to send someone to meet us
at the hospital at once. It is:
Bangkok
General Hospital - International Medical Centre, 2 Soi 7, Soi Soonvijai, New
Petchburi Road
You
have endangered dear Sister Anita's life. You are now saying you can get the
money. Make up your mind and tell me how to proceed.
For
the first time, I am alone.
Father
Will U. Tuchme
From Mrs.
Kante to Father Tuchme (6/20)
Dear Father,
Where are you? I am very
worried. My sister Elizabeth was in your hotel this morning and she was told
you checked out yesterday. Please your holiness I need to know where you are.
Are you in the hospital with siter Anita. My sister will be there right away.
Please indicate where you are by return mail.
Regards,
Kante(Mrs)
EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: What? Your sister said we checked out. Pretty amazing since we never checked in.
From
Father Tuchme to Mrs. Kante (6/20)
Mrs.
Kante:
Lament
with me Judith, our great sister is gone. She passed restlessly at 4:30 Am. I
am sitting with her body at a different hospital where she was transferred late
last night. My dearest Sister Hanchob is gone, I am saddened beyond words. The
only consolation I have is the name of the Lord and my ability to be with young
males when I return. I have not slept properly in two days. Anita Hanchob desperately.
I
am saddened by you and your business partners. It is not that I blame you for
Sister's death, but I do see disrespect as a major factor. Anita's last thoughts
were of you and your son. In fact, shortly before she passed, she mentioned a
letter I am to retrieve from her luggage. I wonder what it says.
Tears
are clouding my judgement Mrs. Kante. I am checking into a different hotel and
am very wary of who to trust since your dealings with Mr. Desmond. So many people
here are offering me business partnerships. In the hospital waiting room I met
a couple named Maram and Sule who offered me a similar arrangement. Can I trust
you Mrs Kante?
As
is required by church law, If I am to meet a new person, I am to have a photograph
of them holding a sign with my name on it. Prove to me that this new person is
real and honest by doing this and arranging for said person (Elizabeth) to also
be holding a bunch of flowers in Anita's memory, in the photograph.
I
am in no hurry to leave Bangkok, as my airline tickets are open. I believe that
Anita would want me to stay and do some good. This time, I will not let you know
where my money and I are until you prove yourself.
These
wire transfers sound like a pipedream.
I
am devistated, and in morning the loss of my dear sister in the lord,
I
am,
Father
Will U. Tuchme
From Mrs.
Kante to Father Tuchme (6/21)
Your Holiness,
It is with rude shock and
a heavy heart that I received the bad news of sisterAnita's death. Ever since
you told me she collapsed on the road, I have been praying the rosary. Why would
God allow this to happen to me. Father, it's my fault because if only I was there
to receive the only woman that loved me and my son, I would have lived. Father,
how can I sleep today. I am now in a